it's been a really long time since i last updated. don't really know what to write online since i have a handwritten journal as well. many things happened since i ord-ed and i thought my life just started. i really enjoyed what i did. first, i went back to china to visit my relatives and i did things over there which couldn't be done in singapore, like playing with firecrackers and so on. then, i went to a special school to volunteer as a class assistant and it was then i was exposed to children with mental disorders. they gave me a really tough time at first but things got better when i got used to them and i actually missed them now. just recently, i came back from a missions trip and it really opened my eyes to the needs of the people out there. how can i be struggling with the little things in my life when there are so many people out there who need prayers and people to go to them? it hurt when i heard of parents running away and children not receiving treatment for 2 months after falling ill. but then, what can i do to help them? why is it that life can be so good for some but they don't see it and life can be so bad for others but they are contented with what they have? ARGH!